1:31AM

this shit feels foreign to me

whats up with the old Lj people aha

add my new one please! (sarah, and rachel)

treehouse_lover see you there.

4:01PM

Just a reminded

NEW LJ : treehouse_lover

3:50PM

EVERYONE I MADE A NEW LIVEJOURNAL. I WILL NEVER USE NANCYBABE00 AGAIN.

IT IS TREEHOUSE_LOVER

add me i need friends. k thanksssssss

10:55PM - FUCK YOU ASSHOLE

WHOEVER IS SO FUCKED UP THAT THEY CANT EVEN AT LEAST LEAVE THEIR NAME WHEN THEY LEAVE ME ASSHOLE COMMENTS I HOPE THAT YOU FUCKING GET HIT BY A CAR YOU SON OF A BITCH!!

WELL ON THAT HAPPY NOTE MY JOURNAL IS NOW FRIENDS ONLY SO I DONT GET FUCKED UP IMMATURE (PROBABLY SOME FUCKING LAME ASS HIGHSCHOOLER) LEAVING COOL ANNONYMOUS COMMENTS

HEY IDIOT LEAVE YOUR NAME AND SAY IT TO BE FACE. YEAH SCARED. GOOD.


PS, I CAN'T WAIT TO MOVE TO CALI IN 2.5 MONTHS SO FUCK ALL OF YOU!!11


FRIENDS ONLY
FRIENDS ONLY


F R I E N D S O N L Y

9:36PM - reality is killing me on the inside

Tonight I figured out that there is no such thing as a true friend, a true honest human being. It just doesnt exist. Yeah I'm not perfect, but that doesn't mean i can't rant and rave about people. What is the meaning of a true friend? it's like I'm putting up with things just to feel accepted on the exterior, but really on the inside everything is empty, nothing ever gets fullfilled. I've had yet another empty relationship that I want nothing to do with.(sorry for hurting you) It seems as though I strive so hard to make my surroundings happy,but yet they just pull out my insides and use it as their stepping stool. well, i'm tired of being exteriorly accepted, when i feel like a piece of trash, casually laying in the back seat of somebodys car carelessly mistreated. Why do you always have to be so set in your ways instead of opening up to new ideas? I hate feeling like someone who is so looked down upon because I'm not going to a university. sorry that my parents aren't full of cash to blow on me. sorry that im not fucking you.


i hate feeling so fucking shitty about everything, because I love so much about everything. fuckyouinsidefeelings.


PS: true friends don't judge you for your actions/choices/love life/personal feelings etc. f u.

12:08PM - dun dun dun dun dun dun dun

RIP BABY SIMON. =*(





Simon when he was a baby.


Simon when he sleeps on my computer table.


Simon being cute and playing on the couch.


Simon when he got stuck in our tree.

5:37PM - what a nightmare.

Last night I had a dream that I told Lauren i didn't want to live with her in california, and my parents decided to just buy me my own 1 bedroom apartment, and it had 3 queen sized beds in it, and it was on the 14th floor, and i had a view of the ocean and i was RIGHT on the beach and all that, and my apartment was like a freaking bachlorette bad, amazing! BUT...the shitty thing was..since i lived alone, i had NO friends, and i started having panic attacks cause i had nothing to do, and one night i drove around in my car to find somewhere to go and I kept getting lost and no one would help me cause i was in the ghetto and then i couldn't find my way home and i just getting really scared and i woke up in a frantic! GOD i hope that doesn't happen.\\



PS> i love you all.

10:52PM - rant, rave and kill yourself.

I want one of those best friends for christmas. You know, the kind of person who you can call up at 2 in the morning and they will answer their phone (even if they have been sleeping for 4 hours). One of those people that can sense everything you're feeling and actually be RIGHT. (not guess and be completely wrong and put you in a worse mood for not having a best friend that can sense things about you). Agreed, I'm not the easiest person to figure out, but come on, how hard is it really?

lately I've been questioning my infatuation with a certain person, and why? Is it because I actually enjoy being with them? or is it because they are too nice and too good for me? Whatever the reason, I don't like it. BUt i'm NOT going to screw it up like I have with the last 12323423443654325435432598743509876-98-0943507348575453 people who have come along.

I feel like an old bitter hag, who likes to kick animals into a blizzard.

Tonight my brother (that lives here) told me that I am the most negative person he's ever met in his entire life. And lately i've been FEELING like the most negative person in the world. Yeah it's my fault, but it is all really how i feel. SO what if christmas is my least favorite time of year? I guess I should keep that to myself huh? Well it's not like i hate all times of year. So suck it. I need an adult to talk to, who is wise and can support me on my life decisions.

Right now I feel like everything is 234324% focused on my brothers decision to leave for the army reserves and have 2343 speeding bullets whizzing by him. Sure, I'm sad, hell it even brings me to tears just mentioning/it talking about it. (like right now), but why do my parents support him practically signing his life over for this god forsaken country, rather then help me and support me with my fucking future, and NOT sign up to die? What kind of bullshit is that? Yeah I support brother bear, but parents should have enough support to go around? I think that's why christmas time this year is shit. I mean every year I have a reason to feel like shit on christmas, ( ask any of my friends) it's just a matter of what? and this year my parents are it.. I love them, but come on.

2:07PM - oh my

i used to hate gwen stefani.

but in about 47 minutes i will be holding her cd in my hands.

i love it
i want it
i need it.


my shit is bananas
B_A_N_A_N_A_S

quality.


48 hours birthday bash - less then 3 weeks.

4:44PM

my new tattoooos

it's red cause it was RIGHT after i got it done blah..






( i have 2 of these woo)

2:59PM - ah

I have nothing to say.
so I'll say it anyways.

I'm still in my pajamas, blah bored. Why do you have to be at meetings all day today? i have no one to see or talk to now! BOOOO MEETINGS AND NOT SLEEPING IN ALMOST 48 HOURS!!!!!


I hate when people try to be "deep" and find meanings behind the obvious.

here's for all you analytical people out there..find the deep meaning in this.


"The grass is green, the sky is blue."

good luck with that.

1:37PM - blah

I haven't been this excited/anxious about something in a long time...

why do you have to bring it all down?


i hate negative people.

12:26PM

I just dropped every single class at chemeketa EXCEPT.. for PHOTOGRAPHY and far east religions. im a dork. BUT IM NOT GOING BACK TO CHEMEKETA AFTER THIS MWAHAHAHHA..

COME APRIL I'LL BE MOVING TO BURBANK...CALIFORNIA.. for school booo..I CANT WAIT!!!


this is what for (incase you wanted to know )..




come visit me please!!!!

3:15PM

i saw layne last night. the end.

10:23PM - since myspace isn't working...

Well finals are over..hooray.
im really not in a writing mood. at all i don't even know why i'm writing in this silly thing.

Hmm this time last year i would be..OH THATS RIGHT IN FREAKING NEW YORK BITCHES!!! grr i can't wait to go back someday.

tomorrow we're getting tattoos. shit.. pictures for sure. (if you want them????)
saturday is my moms surprise party hooray for surprises!!
OH MY FKN GOD LAYNE (BROTHER) COMES HOME FROM IRAQ! PRAISE ..I DONT KNOW..SOMEONE?!?! SHOOOT YES IM SO HAPPPPPPPPPYYY im going up to portland to see him!!!!! ic ant waitttt ahhhhhhhhhhh LAYNE!!! HOOORAAAYYY

yeah. my life sucks. i hate being excluded from my best friends "Cool crew" hmm whatever. I HAVE 3 CATS, AND CURRENTLY 3 BROTHERS SO TAKE THAT WHORE(S)!!!!!

6:28PM - hooray for life

HOORAY for my new icon.
HOORAY for learning how to put music in myspace
HOORAY for finding a paper from JR year to turn in as my final paper.
HOORAY for friends being home for the holidays
HOORAY for planning my birthday.
HOORAY FOR EVERYONE IS INVITED!!!!!

10:19PM

( I'm probably just going nuts...right?? )

8:04PM - WHAT DOES YOUR NAME MEAN BIATCH

nan·cy    ( P )  Pronunciation Key  (nns) also nance (nns)
n. Offensive Slang pl. nan·cies, also nanc·es

Used as a disparaging term for an effeminate man, especially a homosexual man.

2:32PM - RE: WINTER TERM

my schedule is going to keep me SO busy and out of trouble~ hooray!!


MONDAY:
math 10:30-11:20
english 11:30-12:20
Photography 6:00-9:00

TUESDAY:
math 10:30-11:20
interpersonal communication 6:30-9:30

WEDNESDAY:
math 10:30-11:20
english 11:30-12:20
Photography 6:00-9:00

THURSDAY:
Primitive and Far Eastern Relgions
6:30-9:30

FRIDAY:
math 10:30-11:20
english 11:30-12:20


Night classes MONDAY-THURSDAY is going to kick my ass. but it's for my own good.